Dreams

All morning I fought with myself to get up and get going. I had this heavy feeling on my chest, feeling like, no matter how hard I try, this whole thing might just be a little too big for one small women.

So I called my friend and magically started making coffee, and putting on my shoes

She talked to me almost all the way to the shipyard and gave me strength to believe in myself and my dream.

As soon as I got to the shipyard I started cleaning the saildrive and taking old rusty parts off to make them shine again. After some hours of work, one of the men working at the shipyard came by and brought some coffee, asking how I am. First time, someone there came to offer an open heart and not just unwanted advice. It felt amazing!

After the coffee I continued my work for a while until my motivation left me ones again.

So there I am, calling my friend again. Her love, giving me strength to hussle through. So I do.

Until another guy comes, asking how I am. I climbed down from my boat. To ones again be questioned "are you crazy?" "You won't be able to afford that" "you don't know what you're getting yourself into" and so on

Half an hour passes and my strength to smile at these men, is getting less and less. I feel attacked, even though I know better than that. So I left. Continued doing my work, getting closer to my dream, one screw after another.

And suddenly I feel warm tears running down my face, feeling all my strength disappear. Why do I let the opinion of old men, stuck in a shipyard get to me?

I cleaned up my mess and was just now on my way home, when the one guy with a genuine heart in this place, came to pick me up for a tea down at the water. And just for a second there, I had a boat man smile at me and say "I strongly believe in your dream" he gave me hug and I am now on my way home, to clean my body and my mind.

Slowly starting to breath in deeply again. Remembering, that these fears, aren't mine. That all of these men wanted to sail the world one day and not one of them did

There opinion of me and my journey doesn't matter. And I know that. But still I can't help but wonder, if they would say all this to a men as well?